Home Funny Stuff Our Travel Version of “A Visit From St. Nicholas” (With Apologies to Clement Clarke Moore)

Our Travel Version of “A Visit From St. Nicholas” (With Apologies to Clement Clarke Moore)

by SharonKurheg

‘Twas the night before travel and all through the suitcase,
Not an item was stirring, not even the toothpaste.

Warm sock were all packed in your bag with great care,
Because home for the holidays! It’s really cold there!

Your tickets were nestled all snug in an app,
All ready to pull up within just a snap.

Your alarm was set for a morning 3:30,
Cuz TSA said to be 3 hours early.

The weather at home had 12 inches of snow,
With a grab of your boots, you were soon on the go.

You stop at the Starbucks to help get alive,
But they were still closed and not open ’til 5.

No traffic encountered, at airport ere dawn,
As you look for a parking spot, albeit with a yawn.

The TSA workers are in a good mood,
But they still make you unpack your liquids and food.

Repacking your stuff is a pain in the neck,
You think again, “Maybe I should get Pre-Check.”

At your gate just in time, with mere moments to spare,
You have no real legroom as you glide through the air.

Middle seat given, it’s really not best,
While your neighbor keeps hogging the one shared armrest.

You sleep fitfully, this sure ain’t your bed,
As visions of Business Class dance in your head.

While napping you missed snacks from the aircrew,
No liquor, Stroopwaffels, or Biscoffs for you!

You awaken – the thud of wheels on the ground,
Then wait for your luggage that you hope will be found.

Your bag comes out first, in the world all is right,
It’s the icing on the cake of no connecting flight.

Your Silvercar rental was painless, whoopee!
Cuz they are, “car rentals the way it should be.”

You drive to their house, the traffic’s terrific,
Construction makes 4-letter words quite prolific.

You finally arrive at your destination,
It’s time to begin your holiday vacation!

(If this scenario makes you feel kind of wary,
Then what can we say but Your Mileage May Vary!)

Season’s Greetings to you and yours! Safe traveling!

Joe & Sharon


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This post first appeared on Your Mileage May Vary

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