Sign Your Enemies Up For This Offer: Bad Wines And Frontier Miles

Sharon and I are not wine snobs. We do, however, enjoy a nice glass of wine with dinner. We’ve visited wineries in Napa, Sonoma, Willamette, OR and even in Tasmania during our Adventures by Disney trip to Australia. Our journeys have also brought us to winemaking facilities in Hawaii, Texas and Florida that eventually led me to develop the mantra of “Just because you can grow grapes and make wine, doesn’t mean you should.”

That’s the feeling I had when this offer hit my email box today:

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Wow, I can earn 10,000 Frontier Miles! Not so fast, here’s the whole offer:

Earn up to 10,000 miles while discovering amazing wines

Earn 3,000 miles with your first shipment, 7,000 miles with your second shipment, plus earn 5 miles per dollar spent with every shipment thereafter.

So what will that cost?

“Your first shipment of 6 wines is $41.94 with 1¢ shipping”

So I’ll get 3,000 miles for that shipment. What about the second shipment?

“You’ll receive a new shipment of 6 captivating wines at just $12–$16 per bottle (plus delivery)”

To get the extra 7,000 miles, you have to get your second shipment. That’s an average of $14/bottle x 6 bottles plus shipping. $84 for the wine plus about $20 shipping. Figure a minimum of $100.

The wines are shipped by Vinesse and advertised to be part of the American Cellars Wine Club

American Cellars Wine Club is Vinesse’s flagship wine club, showcasing hand-crafted wines produced by small boutique, lesser-known wineries or in very limited quantities.

I don’t know about you, but when I think of small boutique, lesser-known vintages, I’m not thinking $15 a bottle wine. That’s the leftovers they can’t sell anywhere else.

I’m a member of the Backroads Wine Club, which is run by the people who took us on our tour of Willamette Valley. They send six bottles of small vintage Pinot Noir and other interesting wines from wineries you can only buy from if you visit in person. Their bargain option starts at $180 for 6 bottles. I’ve received some bottles from them with a list price of $20 that tasted like $50 bottles and $40 bottles that when we drank them felt more like they were worth over $100.

If I’m thinking of wine that costs $12, I’m in the range of something I can buy at Lucky’s Market around the corner and I don’t have to pay to ship it to my house.

Vinesse is no stranger to offering airline miles to sign up for their wine club. I remember a post from Gary on View from the Wing after he received a shipment back in 2015.

But the wine was so undrinkable that no matter how many promotions there have been over the past five years since that, I haven’t bitten. I gave the bottles away from that one wine shipment.

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So if the wine wasn’t enough of a deal killer, this offer lets you earn Frontier Miles. The same miles that I was willing to let expire until I found a way to donate them to charity.

The offer claims the 10,000 miles you can earn are enough for a one-way ticket on Frontier. That may be true but most of the award tickets at the 10,000-mile level can be purchased for under $100. You still have to pay for baggage fees and seat assignments on award tickets so they’re not even free unless you’re OK with a middle seat and buying a carry-on bag that will fit under the seat.

If you’re looking to earn miles that aren’t worth that much and want to sign up for a constant supply of mediocre to terrible wine, this is the offer for you. Otherwise, you could always sign up in the name of one of your enemies as the ultimate double-pronged joke gift, bad wine and miles that are not worth much and expire in 6 months.

This is one offer I’m not even going to give you the link to sign up. If, after all of this, you think this is a good deal for you, you’re going to have to hunt to the offer yourself. You’ll thank me later.

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This post first appeared on Your Mileage May Vary

 

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